Friday, May 3, 2013

reflective essay


Brittney Miller

Professor Thomas

Composition 102

2 May 2013

Reflective Essay

I have always said that over the years in school I struggled in English. I love reading and writing, but always had a hard time with writing essays and researching papers. When I was in the 101 Composition Course I learned many useful tips to improve my writing and reading skills. However, leaving the course I still struggled with a couple of minor areas. Coming into the 102 Course I was very excited on other new ways I can improve my reading and writing skills. The new ideas, tools, and lessons really improved me as a writer and reader.

One of the examples of a helpful lesson that I learned was when we talked about rhetorical analysis. Before I never sat and thought about why the author wrote or how the writer wrote the way he/she did. The lesson on rhetorical analysis improved my critical thinking because it made me look deeper into the article and made me analysis on why the author said what he/she said and why the author said it the way that they did. I also learned about questions to ask myself while reading articles, like what is the message? Who make up the audience? Or what kind of style and tone is used and for what purpose? Asking these questions help me as a reader because I can fully understand what I’m reading and it is much easier to find research on the article because I now know what the article is about and therefore know what to research. Another helpful lesson that I learned, was knowing what fallacies were. I never learned what a fallacy was until this course. Learning about this really helped me as a reader because now I can pick out sentence’s in an article that shows examples of the fallacies and know why the author structured the sentence in that way.

In Composition 101 I learned about many useful tools that helped me with my reading in writing skills. Coming into the 102 class I still learned new tools that I didn’t know before that really helped me in the classroom. I still love using diigo, I will always tell other people who don’t know about diigo to start using it for researching and other things. It really helped me while I research because it allows me to highlight my article online and post notes on the article. The other useful tools that I learned about in the 102 class are the use of podcast/vodcast. I never knew about these tools but I am thankful that I was taught about them in this course. The podcast really helped me fully understand what rhetorical analysis was. Also it was really fun working in groups to make this assignment.

The new ideas that helped me as a researcher was the use of goggle scholar, I was never told or taught about Google scholar and I was surprised to learn that goggle can do more than what I thought it could. Having another way to find creditable research for my paper it took a lot of stress off me because I do not have to worry about if the article is reliable or not. I also learned about helpful tips in writing my thesis sentence. I also had struggled with this in all my English courses. This 102 course taught me many different ways on how to write a good strong thesis sentence. Also the use of partners in class also helped me with writing a thesis statement because I can get their feedback on how I can improve my thesis and get some of their tips on ways that they wrote theirs.

I believe that there are some areas that I can improve in, for an example I still need to work on conciseness and using good word choice in my papers. But I also believe that from my 101 class to my 102 class I feel more confident as a reader and writer. I’m beginning to feel good about each paper that I do and turn in, I also catch myself saying “I really did a good job on my thesis this time!” or “This paper was way better than the last one!” However, the area that I still struggle in is my conclusion paragraph. I also tend to run out of information in the conclusion paragraph because I feel that I already talked about everything in the previous paragraphs. I know that I learned to try to write on something new for the reader and tie everything together, but I still struggle with doing this. But with the use of all the information that I learned for 101 and 102 I am confident that I can still hold on to all my ideas, lessons and tools to be able to improve my conclusion paragraph over the next years.

Revised Essay

Abstract:
Some of the changes that I made to my paper is first I changed the structure around, I put the paragraph about the children and the paragraph about the schools under the low-income families because I believe that it flowed better than having the suppliers paragraph go before the other two.I also made "Adam Drewnowski, who is with...." Into a new paragraph, there was to much information all at once. I believe that the reader wouldn't be to overwhelm while reading the introduction.   I also took out unnecessary words that I didn't need in my paper such as "In", I just started with "The article". I changed around the sentence "In Todays world, nobody takes the time..." because at first it didn't make any sense to me, it wasn't clear. Once I changed it around the sentence was much more readable. I also worked on word choice, I tried to use different synonyms for "problem". I believe that having the same words over and over would make the reader think that their reading the same thing over again; which is not a good thing. The next thing that I changed is the ending to the schools paragraph. I added a transition sentence so it can introduce the next paragraph. I also added more to the Suppliers paragraph. There wasn't a lot of information for the readers to fully understand why the suppliers was struggling due to the high prices of healthy foods. The last thing that I revised was the how to fix this problem paragraph, I added more information on ways we can fix the problem. I used Logos when I talked about Michelle Obama which would create creditability to my proposals.


 
Eating Healthy, Can We Really Afford It?
            There is no doubt that millions of people are struggling in America due to the high prices in the grocery stores and even in fast food restaurants. The main victims who are affected by the rise in prices are low-income families. An article written by the Tufts University Health & Nutrition Letter states that the price of a loaf of white bread has risen nearly 25 cents, red delicious apples are up 20 cents a pound, from 96 cents to $1.16, and eggs have jumped from around $1.45 to $2.18. The rise in prices makes low-income families struggle to feed their families healthy foods. Because of this it leads them to buying unhealthy foods for their families. 
         Adam Drewnowski, who is with the Center for Public Health Nutrition and the Nutritional Sciences Program, states that the low price of energy-dense food encourages low-income Americans to consume an unhealthy diet. Because of the low prices of unhealthy foods it increased the obesity rate in America, not only did the obesity rate go up so did other medical problems like heart disease and high blood pressure. An article by Tammy Esteves states that According to the Centers for Disease Control, more than one third of adults in the United States were obese in 2009-2010. The high prices in healthy foods are a terrible problem because it affects the entire community, but especially the low-income families, the suppliers, and even schools. As the prices continue to rise each year due to the struggling economy, communities need to raise awareness and provide information about ways to buy non-expensive healthy foods for their families.
What is the real price of healthy foods?
            There have been many arguments on whether healthy foods cost more or less than unhealthy foods. An article by Elisa Zied, an MSNBC contributor, states that new government report finds that nutritious foods – such as grains, vegetables, fruit and dairy – typically cost less than items high in saturated fat and added sugars. In her article she explains that it’s all on how you look at it.  For an example if you look at the price of edible weight or price per portion to determine costs, then the cost of healthy foods such as oat cereal, vegetables, fruits, and low-fat milk, are more affordable than most protein foods. On the other hand, if you measure the price per calorie then many healthy foods such as fruits and vegetables cost more than less healthy foods. But it all boils down to the grocery bill. In today’s world, nobody takes the time to weigh their produce and compare it to the price. We, as Americans, always look for the better bargain.
Low-Income families:
            Because of wanting to get more for our money, Americans, especially the low-income families tend to have a poor eating habit which leads to obesity. Obesity rates in the United States have risen sharply over the past 2 decades. The article, Poverty and obesity by Adam Drewnowski, states that the highest rates of obesity occur among population groups with the highest poverty rates. How can this be? Many low-income families tend to buy fatty foods because they typically cost less. They also buy fatty foods because they know that buying these foods will satisfy them and healthy foods do not. A study by Lillian Mwanri, on the Food supply and the obesity scourge, states that it is clear that price has an influence on food purchasing decisions and dependence on less nutritious but more economical and socially acceptable foods; contributes to disproportionate rates of obesity among groups with limited economic means. Speaking of limited economic means, transportation in the low-income areas also has a big impact on the obesity epidemic. In the article Does availability of physical activity and food outlets differ by race and income? The author Jamie Zoellner, states that a poorer food environment, such as higher concentration of fast food restaurants and a limited selection of fresh produce in grocery stores and markets in low income areas tend to lead to obesity. This is a huge problem because low-income households are forced to select foods, with higher proportions of grains, added sugars and fats. Having smaller grocery stores make it easier for people without cars, but the stores do not provide enough healthy foods, which then leads to obesity. The obesity epidemic due to the high prices of healthy foods is a huge problem, but we also have to look at each stakeholder who is affected by the high prices.


The Children:
The children are the main innocent ones who are affected by the high prices of healthy foods. By being so young they have to rely on their parents to provide them with food to eat. Not knowing that healthy foods will maintain them from being healthy, children tend to enjoy eating unhealthy fatty foods. In the article by the Food Research and Action Center (FRAC), it states that the Obesity rates increased by 10 percent for all U.S. children 10- to 17-years old between 2003 and 2007, but by 23 percent during the same time period for low-income children. The low-income children rates are higher due to the lack of healthy foods. The parents are struggling to provide food for their children to eat. By buying cheap unhealthy foods from the grocery store it allows low-income families to get more for their money. “Households with limited resources to buy enough food often try to stretch their food budgets by purchasing cheap, energy-dense foods that are filling – that is, they try to maximize their calories per dollar in order to stave off hunger “(FRAC)  How can these families help their children from not being obesity if they can’t afford healthy foods from the supermarkets?
In the article The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition by Adam Drewnowski and SE Specter they state that very young children learn to prefer novel non-sweet flavors once the flavors have been associated with a concentrated source of energy, such as starch or fat. This is a issue because young children already starting off preferring fatty foods over healthy foods. This is caused by the parents not being able to afford fruits and vegetables for their children so they buy unhealthy foods so their children won’t go hungry. This then later leads to obesity.
Schools:
Not only are children affected by the high prices on healthy foods in the grocery store, the schools in which these children attend are effected as well. There have been many debates about having more healthy foods in school lunches due to the high rates in childhood obesity. In 2011 President Barack Obama signed the Healthy, Hunger-Free Kids Act, which aims to provide healthier meals and prevent obesity, among other measures. Even though this is a great program many critics believe that schools are going to be affected in a negative way. Due to the high prices of fruits and vegetables schools has to increase the cost of their meals. The article Healthier school lunches driving prices up by Kevin Hardy he states that food prices that already were rising now will climb even more because of the severe national drought, which is decimating some crops and threatening to raise the price of meats, fruits and vegetables. Children in school are now force to pay more for their meals at school. Not only are the childern at school's affected by the high price of healthy foods, the suppliers of food industrys are having major struggles.

The suppliers:
            No one ever would have thought that even the suppliers of fruits and vegetables are affected by the high price in the supermarket. The article by Mattea Kramer, I read that fresh produce is more expensive because it has a short shelf life. It has to be picked, shipped, stocked, purchased, and eaten quickly to prevent spoilage. The problem with this is that with the high prices of fruits and vegetables many people do not buy the product so it ends up being removed from the shelf and wasted. Also The United States Depatment of Argiculture (USDA) states that the 2012 drought destroyed or damaged portions of the major field crops in the Midwest, particularly field corn and soybeans. This has led to increases in the farm prices of corn, soybeans, and other field crops. This statement is saying that because of droughts and other damages to produce in the fields the suppliers are forced to raise their prices to be able to not lose out in money. But doing this makes it hard for low-income familes to buy their produce so in the end the suppliers still lose out in money.  The suppliers and low-income families are both connected, they need to have a fair balance so they can both have what they want.
 
What can we do to fix this problem?
            We generally cannot fix this problem ourselves, however we can stand up and speak out about this problem. We Americans need to come together and speak on this problem, by doing this we can inform and persuade someone higher in power, which is the government. The government needs to find ways to help the low-income families with being able to buy healthy foods, if they dont then millions of families are going to end up obese. Michelle Obama knows of the struggle for healthy foods for low-income families. In her campaign, LetsMove! She states that an estimated 49.1 million people, including 16.7 million children, lived in households that experienced food insecurity multiple times throughout the year. She also states that the Let’s Move! compaign is committed to helping ensure that all families have access to healthy, affordable foods.  This is a fantasic campaign because it allows low-income familes to get useful information on ways to save money on healthy foods. Also the article Why is Healthy Foods Expensive? On strenghhealthy.com, states ways on how we can save our money when buying healthy foods. For an example they state that we should buy our fruits and vegetables in season. By buying fruits and vegetables in season then the fruits and vegetables tend to be less expensive. Also they state that we should buy store brands over national ones. Store brand items typically cost less than other branded items. And lastly they state that we should find a local farmers market for fresh produce.